By Brian Gotta, President of Help Kids Play

A reader wrote in and asked my opinion on a very touchy subject. A dad sent an email describing a girls’ high school coach who exhibited angry, sarcastic and belittling behavior when coaching the team. The dad related that he’d spoken to this coach on numerous occasions, expressing his displeasure with the coach’s handling of the girls, and that other parents had as well. Each time, he said, the coach’s behavior improved temporarily, but he’d soon relapse into the same mean and negative personality. In the most recent incident, the dad reported that his daughter had come home in tears and ready to quit because she’d been unsure of what to do at practice and the coach had embarrassed her in front of all of the other players by showing his irritation and making them all stop what they were doing to listen to her question.
The dad said he’d read my article on parents and playing time and would like some advice. What I wrote, (below) is not significantly different than what was written in the original article. What it comes down to is that sooner or later, kids will have to handle these types of situations on their own, and though this is not one of the pleasant aspects of life, perhaps the positive in being faced with a situation like this is that lessons that can be learned and applied in the future:
Hi (name),
Thank you for your note and for asking my opinion on this matter. This is a very tough and touchy subject and, unfortunately, I don’t have any magic solution for you.
First, I’m obviously going to have to take it on faith that this person is acting as you say he is, which leads to several other questions. Does he seem to focus this behavior more on your daughter, or is he equally sarcastic and negative to all the girls? If it is just your daughter, there are different issues to deal with. If you would say the treatment is the same for everyone, then are all the parents upset, or do some believe he is a good coach? It appears that you and others are not afraid to stand up to him, (as many people would be since he controls playing-time), so has anyone gone to the Athletic Director with complaints? One parent complaining about the coach is probably not going to change anything, but if a substantial portion of the team voiced the same concerns, it is more likely the AD would believe it is a real problem. That is the only way I see this coach being replaced.
Outside of having him removed, based on what you have said, I do not believe there is anything you can say or do to make him change. Therefore, the only other options I can see are quit the team, or deal with it.
I know how hard it is having kids playing for coaches we don’t like. It is terrible. We want them to be happy in everything they do and this must tear at you. However, the silver lining could be the life-lessons your daughter could learn. All her life she will be in situations where she must deal with disagreeable people. Someday she may have a job where her boss is just like this coach, (I’ve been there). When that day comes, she won’t have you to talk to the boss to try to get him to be nicer…she’ll have to handle it herself. If her way of handling it is to quit, she’ll end up having to find a new job, and may like the new boss even less.
I would see if there isn’t something she can to to improve her relationship with him such as working harder or being more of a team leader. Find out what he wants as a coach and do the best she can to give that to him. If she can’t improve her effort in any way, I’d recommend she takes the initiative to speak with him herself and address her concerns. It may be that he’d respect that more than hearing from her parents, and he might be more likely to think twice before belittling her the next time. And you’d be giving her an opportunity to learn a valuable skill in dealing with people that will benefit her the rest of her life.
I hope this is helpful and that your daughter sticks it out. Again, I appreciate your taking the time to write in and ask my opinion.

One of our readers, Dennis Hillyard, has written several terrific articles regarding coaching.
I am often asked which profession is similar to that of the soccer coach.
Without hesitation I always reply a SCHOOL TEACHER‟ but with one very important difference.
The teacher usually specializes in one or two subjects and where for example there are thirty students in the class then guaranteed that a fair percentage will NOT be interested in the particular topic (s). Accordingly, youngsters will always learn quicker when being taught something they enjoy.
Children are required to attend school by law. They are NOT required to attend soccer training therefore the advantage and it is a tremendous advantage is that youngsters join a soccer club simply because they WANT to play soccer thus, the role of the coach Is that much easier.
Unfortunately, with this advantage and even if the squad of youngsters are all extremely talented then it is not always a guarantee of success.
Why? If we refer back to the teacher versus the soccer coach then the teachers role basically is to develop the individual students abilities whereas the soccer coach whilst requiring to do exactly the same than has the added responsibility to develop those individual skills within the framework of the team.
At the same time it is ESSENTIAL that each child should retain there individual skills so that they are best utilized for both, the benefit of the player and the team.
Contributed by Dennis Hillyard, FLMSL Head Coach

By Brian Gotta, President of Upstart Sports

Local Leagues are starting tee-ball programs across the country, which means two things: A lot of parents who lack experience will be coaching a team for the first time, and a lot of kids will be learning the game from a lot of inexperienced coaches.

If you’re coaching beginning baseball in non-competitive levels, the rules that apply are less complex, but not less important than in competitive levels. And in watching beginning-level managers and coaches in action, there are two glaring weaknesses I see. One is the lack of fundamental skills being taught. The other is the ignorance of or disregard for basic baseball rules. Teaching your players the basic rules they need to learn from the beginning, so that they will have a strong foundation in this regard in later years.

I’ve actually had managers ask me why I thought it was so important to enforce rules when the kids were young and no score or standings were kept. The answer should be obvious. If players are subject to proper adherence of the rules when they are starting out, they will be better able to focus on skill development as they get older, instead of having to devote valuable practice time simply learning things they should have been taught at an early age. However, in situations when coaches/parents are also the umpires, sometimes their competitiveness clouds their better judgment. I witnessed examples of this in my league’s local rule in the lowest two levels, T-ball (six year-old players) and “Coach-pitch” (seven years old). Our league instituted a rule that in the case of a ball being hit to the outfield, all runners must stop as soon as it is retrieved and thrown back into the infield. This rule was put in place because we wanted kids to learn that when the ball is in the infield they need to stop running. Otherwise an aggressive player would never stop, knowing that at this level the chances are remote of someone being able to complete a successful throw, catch and tag to get him out. Having a player circle the bases on a pop fly that lands in short right field might be fun for the batter and his parents, but is it teaching anyone on the field good baseball?

Yet invariably, I’ll watch a game where a coach at third base is waving runners around to home, his arm whiling like a windmill, even though the ball is clearly in the infield. I’m sure that often this coach is just a dad who is helping out and may not even be aware of the rule. But it is your job as Coach or Manager to make sure he is informed, and follows the guidelines. You may think it is fun for the players on your team to run home every time they touch third base, but it’s not fun for the other team whose coaches are following the rules, and it’s not teaching your players properly either.

Enforcing the rules is the best way kids learn the sport. I’ve seen youth league games where a fielder makes a great play and throws it to first, and the first baseman catches it with his foot substantially off the base. The parent gallery is cheering wildly because of a rare, successful pick-up, throw and catch. Consequently, the parent on the field responsible umpiring calls the runner out. I believe everyone on the field would learn more in this case if the umpire would have called the runner safe, and then taken a moment to explain what happened to both teams.
​
On the other side of the spectrum, I’ve also witnessed parent-coaches allow batters to stay on first base even though they were clearly out on the play. When the player begins sobbing uncontrollably and refuses to leave the base after being called out, some coaches elect to take the easy way out and just let him stay at first. But what does that teach player? And what about the fielders who successfully made the play – shouldn’t they be rewarded? We all know that leniency teaches nothing good, and that players learn more from their failures than from their successes.

With all that said, there it is important to keep things in perspective. Kids in T-ball and Coach-pitch are just out there to have fun and learn a little baseball – in that order.

Why wouldn't you want to design gloves for your travel or high school team? We know you'll love them. Let's get the ball rolling today!

Top-notch organizations need top-notch batting gloves. That's where we come in. Elevate your team to the next level by designing your own custom gloves here.

Yes, we know, it's like choosing a favorite candy from the candy store, but the good news is, you don't have to choose just one! We'll do multiple designs for your team and players can pick their favorites, or even have home and away gloves! Get started here!

These elegant custom batting gloves will make their team uniforms pop. You can create your own team design too, right here!

These are some sweet-looking gloves, displaying the old red, white and blue. Who can have team custom gloves made? You can too!

A client who ordered custom softball gloves for their team recently sent us an email with this message:

The girls love them and they turned out great.  Any time you need a reference please let me know I'm happy to be one. 

We'd love to do a new design for your team too. Get started here with a free, digital mock-up!

These gloves were constructed out of the highest quality leather and stitched with precision. That's why, when batters dig in wearing our gloves, they know pitchers are quaking in their cleats. Get started ordering some for your team today!